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Jan. 3rd, 2009

Tit Soup?

Hello again darlings, so much has happened! I promised to describe my adventures so here they go. Last night I met up with my beautiful friend E. She looks like a down to earth Grace Kelly with a little more spunk. She was having a shitty birthday and I was determined to turn things around. So away we went to a party in DC. The people were a mix of your typical non profit activists, wild children, and undercover suits. We drank red wine and ate something organic. It's red wine with that crowd, isn't it? As I adore merlot it's fortunately not a problem. So there was a hot tub and a massage therapist with his massage table and oils in tow. E. got an hour long massage and I jumped into the hot tub in my underwear. Around me were two naked girls, or was it three? Yes three naked girls and two naked boys. We chatted politics, drunken adventures, and travel. E. joined us and the night got interesting. There is a game you play where each person tells a part of the story a few sentences, and passes it on. Our stories quickly devolved into drunken orgies and lunacy. E. Left and people wandered away till it was me and B. B had a boyish charm, as well as a sort of yuppie patina peeking through his cowboy hat. Yes he was naked in the tub in a cowboy hat. Now group nudity and individual nudity are two completely different things. While there was a gaggle of nudies around me it did not seem so odd, but me and B. in his cowboy hat that started to become painfully obvious. Suddenly my sufficiently opaque underwear did not seem like enough cover as he started prodding with completely pervy questions about my sex life. I told him I did not discuss it with strangers. Of course that did not do much to discourage, he had a clever quip "I'm not a stranger I've known me my whole life". Now the funny thing about B. and the awkwardness is that he was a self professed feminist and lover of Bust magazine. I thought those men were not supposed to do that. Later me and E. had a discussion on the different varieties of male asshole and one particularly interesting species is the man who professes feminist leanings in order to get girls into bed. He knows the writers, the magazines, the theory, and the things to say, and yet, alas, he is just your usual ass. Other kinds were the beefcake, the metrosexual, the fratboy, the seducer.... If you think of more let me know.

Xoxo, Siren

Dec. 22nd, 2008

Hot Child in the City


Hello darling, since I have decided to report back my adventures here is this weekend's report. I dressed in gold embroidery and fitted slacks, like something out of a vampire novel, with deep red lips and wavy mahoghany hair. Heavy pearls rested on my neck, not the tiny pearl necklaces favored by the likes of waspy republicans, no, these were glamour. I decided to go out alone, something I do once in a while when I am burnt out on socializing, or want to meet new people. If you have not tried it, you absolutely must!

The club was dark, flashing with colored lights, and filled to the brim with eyes. Watching, it is a natural human reaction to watch the person who just walks in, but it is oh so easy to forget, to feel those eyes as an awkward weight. To make the situation worse, I saw three former unsuccessful suitors who had tried to pick me up on nights past. I shook off my discomfort with a glass of merlot and doodled off a thought or two in my notebook. I need a little time to soak in music and the atmosphere before I can dance and socialize. Sometimes it is perfect just to sit still sipping my wine.

Feeling sufficiently filled with some heavy gothic dance beat, I grabbed my crimson coat and went out for a smoke. I met a gaggle of girls, two of them wearing belly dancing coin belts. As I have been studying bellydancing for some time I had to say hello and had a lovely little chat. The girls left and a group of men took their place. Three of them, I think. A soldier with a fratboy smile in a white t-shirt, an army medic in a black suit with a red tie, and another who was utterly forgettable. The soldier and the medic both chatted me up a bit, but the medic was more determined, he followed me around for quite some time after, interjecting normal conversation with horrific awkward moments.

He was well built with dark brown eyes and the army hair, not bad looking, but there was no spark. I did not feel compelled to kiss him, there was no electricity, no magic. He tried to make it come by brushing my hair out of my face, kissing my hand, telling me how beautiful I looked, and had I felt even a small bit of magic, it would have been a lovely evening. However, I did not. I looked away after his attempts, left, moved back, sipped my wine, left again... I guess he thought persistence would eventually change my mind? Soldier of the white t also came up and interrupted, which pissed medic boy off royally, setting him off on a tirade of how loud and annoying he thought his friend was. Doubly awkward. Before I left for the night, he turned to me and said; "If it was any other night, I would ask you to come home with me."  What are you thinking!?! I responded with "Um, no thanks." I can't imagine...  But enough about him. The fun parts were in between the awkard minutes he would interject into my evening before I ran away again.

I danced, of course, feeling stiff at first, as it had been months since I had been at a club (damn graduate school). Soon the music flowed through me, the beat catching my body and making it move. Like floating to shore on the ocean tide. M.E., a lovely girl I had not seen in months, with flowing brown hair, a crushed velvet skirt, and a somewhat renaissance faire look, danced with me. Her movements were smooth, making me think of veil dancers and water. "J. likes you. He thinks you're really pretty. I don't know what he wants me to do about it." She shouted into my ear. Between the loud music, the attentions of medic, and my wine, I had absolutely no idea how to respond. J. was a younger boy with broad shoulders and strong arms. I had seen him before. He had laughing brown eyes and an adorable smile. I hadn't thought of him that way before, but it was a possibility. His face had whatever it was that medic was missing. Or maybe it was just how young and cute his approach was. Regardless, he made me smile. So I said something along the lines of "I'm too confused to think about it.". Smooth operator, this is me.

Some time later, I am dancing, again. I feel particularly caught in the music, my thoughts are gone, I am not worried about a thing. All that matters is the beat. My hips sway and grind, I am alive. Then something amazing happens. A circle of boys, five, maybe six, I think, forms beside me. We are all part of the circle, but I lead. They move when I move. J. is one of them. I can feel their eyes on me, but even that does not distract me from the music. There are girls dressed in much less, moving more provocatively, falling to the floor in a beautiful lascivious performance, which it is not my nature to give. They are not here for that. Can they feel the music like I do? Can they feel the energy I am conducting? I feel a bit like the pied piper.

Till next time.

XOXO Siren

 

Dec. 18th, 2008

Back to Civilization!

Dear reader, I am jumping on the ceiling! I have returned home for the holidays, leaving the small, occasionally sleepy, and frequently soaked in beer, church and football town where I am working on my PhD. Didn't I tell you? Yes I am working on my PhD in Clinical Psychology at a small town lost in the south. The school is great, the town... But enough about that. I am back! This weekend I will be hitting the town with my girls and quite possible flirting my ass off. Goddess knows I have some catching up to do. My southern love life has been, shall I say less than satisfactory. The following just about sums it up:

1) A skinny little man in a cowboy hat comes up to me at a bar. He says forgettable things, then, after finding out I am studying psychology, he offers to let me take a psychological test. I will share this test with you dear reader. You ask the person to imagine a wonderful day. They are walking around and come to a fence. What does the fence look like? They tell you all about their fence, and you have them walk inside it. Now they see a field of strawberries. Ask them to describe it. Be sure to get their estimate of how many strawberries. You tell them they eat the strawberries and enjoy them thoroughly. Tell them these are the best strawberries imaginable. Now ask how they feel about the farmer who grew the strawberries.
Meaning: height of fence is how hard it is to get into their pants, number of strawberries is enjoyment of sex, and the farmer is the way they feel about the man afterwards. Actually amusing to do with people, with the caveat that tis total bull and for me, this story.
OK, you are thinking, you met a wierd little man, so what? The real kicker is a few weeks later I was wasting time online, doing absolutely nothing useful, when I stumbled across a "seduction" website. If you are unfamiliar it is an extremely amusing social phenomenon, where desperate men pay hundreds of dollars for seminars with gurus who will get them laid. The concept seems innocent enough, sort of like Will Smith in Hitch, however many of the techniques are plain insulting. For example you must "get past a bitch shield" that every woman has and lower her self esteem so that she will like you more. Ick. And one of the techniques? The strawberry thing! LOL. Yes, I have met a real life student of seduction.

2) Pointless awkward moments with men who I have zero chemistry with.

3) A huge crush on my dreamy professor, which definitly helped me study, but will never happen. :(  Although it definitely helped me focus and made for wonderful fantasies.

4) An adorable boy with a sruffy hat and a cajun accent who asked to borrow my lighter at the airport. He was wearing a t-shirt and freezing, giving me such an attentive look that I almost took him with me. OK, he's not really a major experience, but he was so cute I can't help but list him!

Hope the city treats me well. XOXO

Siren

Nov. 30th, 2008

My Favorite Preppy Biatch!

That's right, it's Blair Waldorf aka Leighton Meester of Gossip Girl! I don't really keep up with the show, but I love her style so here are some pics for inspiration. <3





Gotta love the tights and abundance of headbands! She's got me hooked onto tights of all varieties! Lacy, white, patterned, and of course classic black!









Bringin' the vest back!



Girly to the max!
 
 
 
 

Hime Gyaru

 Aka princess fashion! A Japanese trend evolving from the other gal styles. Hime gyaru involves a very girly and adorable aesthetic. It is more mature and elegant than the gal styles, and a bit more grown up than Lolita (or at least this is my foreigner understanding of it). Liz Lisa and Jesus Diamante are major brands. Have some pictures and judge for yourself!














Perfect Skin

The semester is almost over and I am jumping for joy. The feeling in graduate school is the same as for an undergrad times a thousand! Regardless, I am procrastinating as usual and have decided to share some of my recent favorite skin care tips!

1) Kiwi is an awesome natural skin brightener! I usually just cut into slices like a cucumber.

2)Milk and yogurt are both brighteners and milk can be used as a toner, it takes care of oiliness without drying.

3) SPF 30 is only about 5% stronger than 15, and much oilier... I don't remember exactly, but I believe 30 blocks 97% and 15 gets 92%. Awesome news for me as I've been sporadic in my sunscreen at best because of icky feeling. I like Aveno Radiant Moisturizer now, not too sticky.

4) This is an uber simple facial, but boil a few cups of water, get a towel and some tea bags (I use jasmine green tea, because green tea is an antioxidant and jasmine smells pretty). Pour boiling water in a bowl, throw a towel over your head as you lean over the bowl, and viola! My skin feels purty  ^ . ^ )

5) I'm a big fan of exfoliating, so I use this St. Ives Apricot Scrub, it has these super scrubby parts

6) You've probably heard this a million times, but eating healthy is a biggie, not too much soda and caffeine, fruits and veggies, nuts, all that healthy goodness. Green tea is awesome here as well. I will always take tea over plain ole water so I am a green tea junkie!

7) Not sleeping with your makeup on is another one of those simple ones

8) Honey is a really nice moisturizer, just slap it on for ten to fifteen, and you will be glowing

9) Another basic is, having a good face wash, toner, and moisturizer (preferably with sunscreen, why make life hard on yourself?)

That'll do for now, if you're reading and think of something to add, shoot me a message! I am dying to know your beauty secrets! <3

Nov. 15th, 2008

Femme Fatale

I think today I will give you pictures. I know you can't sit through too many of those word things.
So here we go, visual imagery with femme fatale as it's theme:


Morgan le Fey
The witchy (possible half sister) of Arthur of round table fame who seduces him and turns the kingdom of it's head. Depending on the version she either does this to save her people from impending doom, or for her own selfish desires.


Salome, the infamous dancer of the seven veils who shimmied so well her step dad and uncle swore to gave her anything she wanted. She wanted the head of John the Baptist on a silver platter. In Oscar Wilde's play she was so sexually obsessed with John she would rather kill him than not sleep with him. He writes it all in a very pretty way of course.


Lilith, Adam's first wife, who wanted to be equal to him and left to be with the rebellious angels when he refused. Darker motifs abound in some of the stories as well; including orgies, blood drinking, and murdering babies. She would have to eat to babies as well to have all the taboos, but sadly she does not.


Coco Channel. You think she is an odd selection because she is associated with prim WASPs with their lips a permanent steely pursed state. That may be her image today, but in her time Coco was a riot. A courtesan and  kept woman who got the funds for her boutique from a wealthy lover, she flouted conventions in a million ways. She wore pants (I know that sounds ridiculous today, but at the time pants were zipper deep in the gender role debate and women who wore them were seen as rejecting their traditional roles), tanned when pale skin was the fashion, smoked, and wore cheap costume jewelery when everyone was draped in heirlooms.




Greta Garbo one of the original difficult women.


La Belle Otero the suicide siren. The last great courtesan and dancer. Eight men killed themselves over her.





Nov. 4th, 2008

Ways to Waste Time on the Internet

Procrastination is one of my favorite things and here are my favorite ways to procrastinate on the internet:

www.doedeereblogazine.com
Website of make up creator, singer, and all around crazy creative chica Doe Deere. Featuring her luscious make up tutorials with fabulous pictures, random observations on the oddities of life, and a chronicle of her life. This next site came from her blog

www.mysteriouspeople.com
Fabulous fakes, feral children, and stars of the occult

www.bombshells.com
I love classic glamour so this site, which is all about the starlets of old is one of my favorite places for inspiration

www.lacarmina.com
Gothic lolita fashion blog. Gothic lolita is a Japanese phenomenon which has made a bit of a crossover into the US. For those of you not in the know it involves Alice in Wonderland with a Rococco feel. Hard to describe, use the google. If you are a fan Kamikazi Girls is a fun movie with a gothic lolita character (make sure it has the subtitles though).

wikipedia in general, but also the weird stuff on there specifically
for example http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buffy_studies
Yes Bufffy Studies of the slaying Buffster
Another one is the seduction community/pick up artist section. Perhaps you have seen the VH1 show? It is a subculture of men focused on picking up women through pseudo scientific ways and paying large sums of money to gurus. The things they have to say about dating.... Just read it

www.hobostripper.com
Diary of a vagabond woman who travels around the country supporting her adventure by shaking that thang

www.ultraorange.net/#categories
Art blog with many pictures

theresaduncan.typepad.com
Wit of the Staircase by Theresa Duncan. Fashion, esoterica, the occult, art, literature, and culture from the lovely late Theresa Duncan

Oct. 26th, 2008

Word Spy

In the process of procrastinating as usual I stumbled across
wordspy.com
a website that defines various neologisms, including various articles etc where they were used. The content is more sophisticated than urbandictionary.
Here are some of my faves:

carcooning (kar.KOON.ing) pp. Using one's car for working, playing, eating, grooming and other tasks normally performed at home or at the office.

gutter bunny n. Mountain biker slang for a person who commutes to work on a bicycle.

multi-dadding pp. Having multiple children with multiple men.

dumpster diver (DUMP.stur dy.vur) n. A person who sifts through garbage, particularly a dumpster, looking for valuable or useful items.

fauxhemian (FOH.hee.mee.un) adj. Relating to something that is bohemian in a fake or pretentious manner. —n. A middle class or wealthy person who affects a countercultural lifestyle. Also: faux-hemian.

camgirl (CAM.gurl) n. A girl or young woman who broadcasts live pictures of herself over the World Wide Web. Also: cam-girl, cam girl, Webcam girl.

Oct. 25th, 2008

Thatcher Illusion




Observe the photograph above. Although one picture may seem a bit off, neither looks that odd.
But look again!



Right side up, the image is horrifying. Especially the one on the left. ;)
So why does the picture appear so normal upside down, but hideous right side up?
Ze answer is in ze brain.
Our temporal lobe contains a special area just for processing faces (the Fusiform Face Area) which is very sensitive to facial expression, appearance, etc. It loves faces. The kicker is FFA will only process an upright face, this is why the upside down face appears somewhat normal.


 

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